is it achievement?

Frankly this blog had been sitting on my draft folder for a long time... I had been thinking how to write my whole adventure. There are simply too much to tell and I do not have any idea how to even start penning.

Personally the finish at Fremantle brought a different set of emotions as it saw the completion of my 'Clipper' experience. I originally did not expect myself to cry when the boat come into the harbour as crowds cheer us on. I predicted that the hardest aspect of the race would be watching the boats leave Fremantle without me on January 1st. But I was not spot on at all.

When I first saw one of my team mate, Sally tearing away when we arrived at the harbour, my eyes turned red. In my heart I truly felt her sense of achievement and I saw my own achievement too. She is a 62 year old retired nurse who did legs 1, 2 and 3. I really admired her courage and perserverance that lasted 3 legs and across the Atlantic Ocean twice and across Indian Ocean and sailed on Southern Oceans. These oceans are well-known for their big waves and strong winds.

My tears just rolled when the other lady (my watch has 7 of us and 2 girls including me) in my watch, Girl Meng (we decided to call the two Mengs this way - the other is Boy Meng) hugged me real tight and said 'Well done, you made it!' Her words struck me hard and I cried uncontrollably. The hardest moments were during the days that I was very sick. So surviving the pneumonia, the subsequent many cold nights' sail, endless numbers of vomiting, the hard work on deck (even on days that I had no food and water and was weak I still manage to work on the sails and ropes), the occasions of horrible food (not able to eat beef limits my choices) made me realise my personal sense of achievement too. The very first day when we set sail, I developed fever in the late afternoon (few hours after we left Durban) which means my pneumonia could have worsen or medication taking its effects. Even with fever, I was not bedridden (which was a good thing). Unfortunately the antibiotics had side effects - it is said to cause nausea and tiredness. The biggest question I had was whether my vomiting was caused by the medication or from seasickness. I know I have seasickness but never such a serious one that last for 7-8 days. In the days under medication, I was also taking seasickness pills (non-drowsy-type) which never worked and I was sedated most of the time. My guess was that the antibiotics for my pneumonia is causing most of my vomiting cos by the 4th day I stopped taking them (not intentionally but purely because I could not stomach any thing into my system) and I actually felt better on day 6 onwards. I remember clearly cos I attempted to do mother (mothers are in-charge of cooking and cleaning of the common areas such as sitting area, toilets and kitchen) on day 7 - which was my turn and Girl Meng did ask me to change if I really feel that I cannot do it. I was feeling better so I pushed myself to make meals for the team. Girl Meng had been the only one who took care of me and ensure that I took my medicine and she took whatever I needed for me. She passed water and food when I needed them and even plastic bags when I needed to throw up when in the bunks area.

Oh.... one of the shots of me sleeping at saloon... I didn't make it to my bunk area!!


In one sentence - the hardest aspect of my misery is to manage the feelings of others onboard.