Roses

A really nice poem to share with all my friends...

The Roses
Each year he sent her roses,
and the note would always say,
I love you even more this year,
than last year on this day.
My love for you will always grow,
with every passing year."
She knew this was the last time
that the roses would appear.
She thought, he ordered roses
in advance before this day.
Her loving husband did not know,
that he would pass away.
He always liked to do things early, way before the
time. Then, if he got too busy,
everything would work out fine.

She trimmed the stems and
placed them in a very special vase.
Then, sat the vase beside
the portrait of his smiling face.
She would sit for hours,
While staring at his picture,
and the roses sitting there.
A year went by, and it was
With loneliness and solitude,
that had become her fate.

Then, the very hour,
The doorbell rang, and there
were roses sitting by her door.
She brought the roses in,
and then just looked at them in shock.
Then, went to get the telephone,
to call the florist shop.
The owner answered, and she asked him, if he would
explain, Why would someone do this to her,
causing her such pain?
"I know your husband passed away,
The owner said,
"I knew you'd call, and you would want to know.
The flowers you received today,
were paid for in advance.

Your husband always planned ahead,
he left nothing to chance.
There is a standing order,
that I have on file down here,
And he has paid, well in advance,
you'll get them every year.
that I think you should know,
He wrote a special little card...he did this
years ago. Then, should ever I find out
that he's no longer here,
that's the card that should be sent to you
the following year." She thanked him and
hung up the phone, her tears now
flowing hard. Her fingers shaking,
as she slowly reached to get the card.
Inside the card, she saw that he had written her a
note. Then, as she stared in total silence,
this is what he wrote... "Hello my love,
I know it's been a year since I've
been gone. I hope it hasn't been too hard
for you to overcome. I know it must be lonely,
and the pain is very real.

For if it was the other way,
I know how I would feel.
The love we shared made everything
so beautiful in life. I loved you more
than words can say, you were the perfect
you fulfilled my every need. I know
it's only been a year,
but please try not to grieve.

I want you to be happy,
even when you shed your tears.
That is why the roses will be sent to you for years.
When you get these roses,
think of all the happiness that we had together, and
how both of us were blessed.
I have always loved you and
I know I always will.
But, my love, you must go on,
you have some living still.
Please...try to find happiness,
while living out your days.
I know it is not easy,
but I hope you find some ways.
The roses will come every year,
and they will only stop,
When your door's not answered,
when the florist stops to knock.
He will come five times that day,
in case you have gone out.
But after his last visit,
he will know without a doubt!
To take the roses to the place,
and place the roses where we are,
together once again.
Sometimes in life, you find a special friend;
Someone who changes
Someone who makes you laugh
until you can't stop;
Someone who makes you believe
that there really is good in the world.
Someone who convinces you
you to open it.

Saying "I Do"

Seems like this is the "in" thing now... in the last 2 years, I have attended quite a few friends' wedding. Well for those who know me, you know that I will only attend very close friends weddings.... it's not about saving the 'ang bao' money but the significance of attending...

I just attended a close friend's wedding few days ago and her wedding left me with some deep thoughts. No..it's not about "when's my turn" but it's the strong emotions that surfaced when I attended the wedding... Lots of history came back to my mind.... all good and bad! I don't think it's about feeling nostalgic having met so many ex-classmates and schoolmates at the dinner. It's all mixed of strange feelings - can't really decipher.

Any ways I'm very happy for the bride and groom... and I like the idea of meeting some old friends. And of course, had to see those that I have no wish of seeing... I am still the same... dreading to meet some people and I made no effort to be chatting up with them.

So why do you marry the guy or the gal? What is marriage all about?

A la folie pas du tout

I wasn't planning to write a blog but this morning's conversation over yahoo left me with some deep thoughts.

It was the usual girlie chat that we had - rational vs emotional. Should we follow the heart or follow the mind? Sometimes, I wonder why we have to be so clear-minded when it comes to matters of heart. There will always be so many "what if"s and "may be"s in our lives and yet we will lay them all on the table to think it through before deciding whether to like a guy or not.

At times, I think our lives are too short to miss oportunities. I have friends who are even more rational than I am... they put a stop before even giving themselves and the guys a chance. So what if he has baggage? Do we simply rule that guy out? The "what if he still loves his wife and wants to reconcile", "what if the kids do not like her", "what if my family does not accept him".... the what ifs are endless... but I think the most important "what if" is... what if he does not love me any more. Relationship may not survive on love alone but without love, a couple would not even be together.

I'm not exactly an opportunist but I think under right circumstances, I am. I will go where my heart or gut tells me to. My current job gives me the energy to live (besides paying all my bills).... sailing is my greatest love... and sailing around the world is my dream. I am hopeful that I will make my dream come true. After watching another Audrey (Amelie) Tautou's film "I want to be famous", (not that I want to be famous, though Audrey (Val) did in the film) I strongly believe that realising own's dreams is the greatest achievements of one's life. Will my dream come true? Dunno but I'm still working towards that every day....

As for the "man of my life', I'm waiting for him to cross my path. Till the day comes, I will live the life that I love.

The year is ending soon

Christmas is just three days away and 2005 is just another ten days away. As much as I would like to enjoy the best of year end holidays, but it seems like my year end wishes never really come true.

If I could recall correctly, I fell sick after Christmas last year and spend the new year nursing a flu, sore throat and cough. This year before I even started all the partying, I already had gastric flu. The worst one I ever had! The gastric acids went up to my lungs and I had severe chest pains.... I almost felt like dying man.... serious no joke! I was woken up in my sleep by the pains. I really advised any one who has gastric ...please do not take chilli and alcohol... it's definitely suicidal.

I think every year end, I always get into this depressive mood. I'm glad that year is ending, all bad memories and experiences are history and a new year is begnning. Ironically, I look forward to all the challenges that lie ahead with apprehension and reluctance.

2004 had been quite a good year. Still at the same company - yes... finally I'm not job-hopping any more. But who knows, there might be another good opportunity out there for me again. Based on the current developments, I should be staying on, working on different kinds of projects. Every day I learnt new things and every project I learned new lessons too - sometimes painful lessons too. Well, these lessons should make me a stonger person.

2005 is going to be a challenging year for us. Our biggest client has been bought over by another giant.. so less business for us? Will leave our fate to the lord...

To all my friends, have a blessed Christmas...

Nothing (no work) to do

It's time of the year again. No events to work on. No deadlines. It's super lull period for me that is driving me nuts.

Well my friends, it's the best time to find a not-so-work-a-holic me now. I'm relaxed and stressless. To the extent that illnesses are surfacing. First was fever and flu and now gastric flu. Can't enjoy food these days.

I have a list of things to do for this December. I hope I can accomplish the tasks that I've given myself.
1) re-paint and re-decorate my room (for a change for the new year)
2) clean up my room (a constant nightmare, gotta stop my mum's nagging!)
3) sort out the photo albums (awaiting some photos from a friend)
4) christmas shopping
5) shopping for a new bed (been trying to find one that I love... so far no luck! don't ask me why it must be a bed that I love, but well, I gonna spend 1/3 of my life on this...why not?)

Actually I can't wait for my bosses to go for their holidays so that we can party in office. All the activities have all been lined up. We will turn our office into a cinema... he he he... sshhhh.... pls dun tell anyone

My first blog

I've finally decided to write a blog. I've read lots of interesting posts from my friends... and of course thanks to my friend who recommended this to me and even suggest that I should start to write one too. Starting is easy but whether I will continue to do so could be a different story altogether. Who knows what happens!

My PC at home has crashed on me 2 months ago and just managed to send it to 'hospital' and hopefully my files are not lost. Well the usual me... never backed up on any thing. ARGHHHHHH.... all my photos and my resumes...damn!!! Will see when I hear from my uncle this week. Keeping fingers crossed. So in the meantime, I have to write my blogs in office.

Had a wonderful weekend with my bunch of old MCS friends.... girls night out. Dinner was at Ichi-ban Sushi-Ramen restaurant at Plaza Sing. Well for the 6 of us we ate only S$105.00. That's not too expensive considering we had great variety of sushi, sets and paper pots. Ooohhh... the cod fish for the paper pot was so fresh... still remembered the fish melting in my mouth. Superb! And we ate for 2 hours.... left restaurant at 9.30pm and adjourned to Wine Network at Dempsey Road. Guess lots of people have heard of Dempsey by now. So Dempsey, here we come. 6 gals in one car, sitting comfortably. Thanks to all the slender gals. Driving there was an adventure. If not for Steph, I think, all of us would have turned around and abandon the thought of having wine there. The building used to be old army barracks and it's just so dark and scary. It felt like a haunted place... and best part of it is going to Blk 13... mere coincidence? It reminded me of NTU HALL ONE BLK 13 where I spent 3 years of uni life.

So trusting Steph, we finally arrived at Wine Network. To my surprise, there were lots of cars parked in front of Wine Network and corner of Blk 13. So it seems lots of people are going to Dempsey to drink wine. Instead of having red or white wine, we found cheap and good champagne. The reason to celebrate - Lisa and Margaret are back in Singapore for holidays - so we had 2 bottles of champagne. Cool place - would recommend friends who drive to go there for drinks on weekend - except for the dark and haunted drive up the minute you turn into Dempsey Road from Holland Road.

That was not the end of the evening. It's supper time at 1am. We went to the Prata place along Thomson Road. As usual, it's the thinnest of the gals are searching for supper. Great food and great company... It was good to catch up! Lisa and Margaret - miss you lots!

This weekend had been eventful for me. I made the decision to take part in the round the world clipper race on the boat called "Uniquely Singapore". But then I cannot afford both fnancially and time to go on a 11 month race. I have opted for 1 leg of the race which last about 2 months. It all happened very quickly actually. I merely thought I was just going for the brief on Friday to find out more about the race but at the end of the brief, they told us to schedule for a meeting with the Clipper-man as they are doing the short-listing already. So I went for it on Sunday. It all went well, in my perspective. I guess I will know the verdict later. There is another round of interview with the Sinagpore Tourism Board for the sponsorship scheme....

It's going to to really cool to take part in this world race... the leg that I have opted for is from Capetown to Fremantle on Nov 2005 - Jan 2006 or Fremantle to Shanghai (passing through Singapore) on Jan - Mar 2006. Basically there will be training in Apr/May 2005 for 2 weeks followed by another training on the Singapore's boat in July-Aug 2005 (to get familiarised with the boat) for another 1 week. All training will take place in Southhamptionm, UK. And then on 18 September 2005, the race kicks off at Liverpool.

Will my dream come true? If it really happens..... I think this will change my whole life. Dear friends, Wish me luck and pray for me!